casual effort (the worst kind but all mine for the first time)

a girl waving goodbye to her appeal
to a made-up audience
with a sweaty arm
and big eyes wide open
blazing past a flaming sunset in a plane

what are the sounds
where are the sounds coming from
the bathroom, of course
shit, shit, fuck
she hears
fuck, she thinks.

she wants dessert
she wants a coursed-out,
prix-fixed agenda of airplane activities
with wine pairings
she has too much/not enough to do

she adjusts her off-the-shoulder,
keeps it off the shoulder
while she lifts her bag into the plastic cabinet

she wants people to stop/start staring
she forgets its normal to be reading a book on plane,
no one is impressed.

she's still thinking about wine pairings
tumbling pink and red ribbons
into her glass with every new course
that is sex no question

reminds me of
walking a dog once, a perfect pit bull puppy
with fur like silk and a little brown nose
its tiny body the right size for my hands
when i held it up safe against the bigger dogs
and put my chin on his sun-warmed, honeysuckle fur